


Like Boys Do

by kira892



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, F/F, Gender or Sex Swap, brief mention of kenhina
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-18
Updated: 2019-03-18
Packaged: 2019-11-24 02:47:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,378
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18160481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kira892/pseuds/kira892
Summary: If Tsukki noticed her running into walls or spacing out mid-conversation with growing frequency, she opted not to say anything about it. It put Yamaguchi on edge for a solid month, always wondering if she was looking too long or lingering too close. It made her try, perhaps way too hard, to be normal. She couldn’t help wondering every time she went out of her way to walk just a few inches father from Tsukki or look just a little to the left of Tsukki’s face whenever they talked, if she was in deep, deep shit. She knew it was suspicious as all hell but she couldn’t seem to stop.Tsukki had always been too good at figuring things out and Yamaguchi had always been too bad at keeping secrets from her.





	Like Boys Do

**Author's Note:**

> Girls like girls.
> 
> I wanted to finish this for Femslash February but ah well, better late than never. Thank u hayley kiyoko for all your lesbian anthems, couldn't have finished this without you!
> 
> This is inspired by [These Amazing Girl Karasuno Designs](https://tsukkibigbitchenergykei.tumblr.com/post/182463054367/viria-i-never-knew-how-badly-i-needed-haikyuu) by Viria on tumblr

In hindsight, it’s really not surprising that it took her so long. Yamaguchi had a lot of good qualities but self-awareness had never been one of them.

 

It started out small, literally; the beauty mark under Sugawara-senpai’s eye, the way it went well with her bright hazel eyes and round cheeks. She was the first girl with a heart shaped face Yamaguchi had ever seen and she found herself staring at her a little more than what was probably appropriate. But that’s normal right?

 

Then after the third years had graduated, she started staring at other things;  Kageyama’s smooth, dark hair and the way it looked in a ponytail, the shape of Nishinoya-senpai’s eyes and how impeccable her winged eyeliner was even when she’s drenched in sweat, Tanaka-senpai’s wide hips and the way her thick, athletic thighs flexed under her shorts whenever she dove for the ball. They were all a bunch of tiny flashing arrows all pointed to the same direction.

 

The last arrow, and this was a secret Yamaguchi would take to her grave, was Hinata. It was a normal day, practice was fun if a little grueling and they were all in the club room changing back into their regular uniforms. Hinata wasn’t even talking to her, she was chattering excitedly at Kageyama about something or another, thin undershirt halfway up her tiny torso. It was a white tank top and it did absolutely nothing to obscure the polka-dotted bra she was wearing underneath. Yamaguchi had been a little bit jealous. Hinata didn’t bother with sports bras, she didn’t really need to. Lucky Hinata with her cute, perky little tits.

 

And that was it, halfway into thinking _they’re so tiny but they look nice on her, she’s got a nice body_ , all the tiny arrows were suddenly never really arrows in the first place, they’d been big, neon billboards surrounded by flashing light bulbs all along and Yamaguchi had just been too dumb to notice them.

 

And really, that’s a _feat_ because the tallest, meanest billboard of all had been right next to Yamaguchi the entire time, looming exactly half a head taller and sneering down at anyone beneath it, literally and figuratively.

 

Tsukki. Tsukki who drew stares everywhere she went, Tsukki who was built like a god-damn supermodel; all long legs, flawless skin and elegant angles, Tsukki with her sharp gold eyes, tiny waist and surprisingly full chest.   

 

Yamaguchi had always thought she was pretty, but it took her nearly ten years and an entire volleyball team of strong, athletic girls to realize she’s _pretty_ pretty. Which, in itself, was not a problem. After all, the other girls in the club were also pretty, but realizing that didn’t feel the same way it did when it was Tsukki.

 

_Tsukki  you’re so cool!_

 

_Tsukki you’re so smart!_

 

_Nice one Tsukki!_

 

There were few things Yamaguchi experienced in her short life that felt like getting a spike directly to the chest from Aoba Johsai’s Ace. It’d knocked the wind out of her, left her reeling for about 5 minutes after.

 

Realizing Tsukki was pretty felt a lot like it.

 

Hinata was entirely unsurprised when Yamaguchi told her. Tsukki hadn’t come to school that day, staying home after coming down with a particularly nasty head cold. They were the first two to arrive at the club room before practice and maybe it was because after two years of being in the same club, Yamaguchi felt closest to Hinata after Tsukki or maybe it was just because of how monumental the revelation felt to her but whatever the reason, Yamaguchi just felt the need to tell her.

 

Hinata quietly sat through Yamaguchi’s retelling of the day she almost twisted her ankle, nodding along as she described missing a step because they were passing by a window on their way down some stairs and the sun hit Tsukki’s hair just right (Hinata did wrinkle her nose at that, the way she usually did whenever anything positive was said about Tsukki. Politely, she didn’t say anything about it though.)

 

“Well...I mean...yeah?” She said as if Yamaguchi had just told her the sky was blue. “I figured you liked her.”

 

“Wh-...How??”

 

“I have eyes?” It wasn’t said to be smug or mean, Hinata just kept looking at her like she was waiting for Yamaguchi to ask her a question, a real one, or at least stop telling her things she already knew. “I mean- everyone on the team thought you guys were like, A Thing” Hinata continued, saying it in a way that made the capitalized letters evident.

 

She bought up a hand and twisted her index and middle fingers together as if she wasn’t clear enough. It was kind of adorable.

 

“You ...did?” She asked weakly.

 

Hinata nodded, then said, eyebrows pulling down. “Then we all realized Tsukishima doesn’t have any feelings and is incapable of love.”

 

That got a reluctant giggle from Yamaguchi and despite the pout she was now sporting, Hinata looked pleased. She patted Yamaguchi’s shoulder with far more force than necessary. She’d definitely been spending too much time with Tanaka-senpai. “You looked like you were gonna throw up when she hurt her hand during the Shiratorizawa match, honestly we were just as worried about _you_.”

 

Yamaguchi just barely resisted the urge to bury her face in her hands. She felt like the whole world was just knocked on its side, or the whole world was finally right side up and she never noticed it was sideways the whole time? She didn’t even care how stupid or embarrassing that sounded. _She_ was stupid and embarrassing.

 

“I really don’t know why you like her as much as you do but I guess I kind of get it?” Hinata continued, looking pensive. She trailed off into silence and the longer it went on, the less pensive and the more grudging her expression got.

 

“Even I can admit she’s hot.” the words were muttered and sounded like they were being dragged out of her mouth inch by painstaking inch with sharp hooks. Clearly she’d been spending too much time around Kageyama too.

 

“Tsukishima doesn’t deserve those legs! Or those cheekbones! Hell, even her boobs are nice? Why does she get nice boobs, she’s a twig??” Hinata continued, a little too loud.

 

“Yeah!!!”

 

They both startled at the exclamation Nishinoya-senpai made as she burst through the club room door, clearly having overheard Hinata.

 

“Who does she think she is?” Nishinoya continued, waltzing over to them and dropping her bag to the floor with a thump.

 

She didn’t seem to have heard anything said before the boob comment but she didn’t care about context, happy to pick up the thread of Hinata’s rant where she’d walked in. The two of them spend the next twenty minutes being outraged over Tsukki’s breasts and lamenting the size difference between them and  their own, humble ones.

 

Having recently realized how much she liked boobs in general, Yamaguchi personally thought neither of them were really lacking despite the difference in cup size between them and Tsukki but wisely, she said nothing.

 

The were discussing BMI (Boob Mass Index as Nishinoya-senpai had put it) and how _certain_ people’s were unfairly too high considering how skinny they were when Tanaka-senpai arrived and enthusiastically joined in the conversation. Her participation threw the discussion into a heated debate that had to be forcefully terminated by Ennoshita-senpai when it devolved into Tanaka and Nishinoya harassing the rest of the team for their cup sizes and guess-ranking everyone by order of highest Boob-MI to lowest.

 

That was the reason Yamaguchi found her eyes straying one too many times to Tsukki’s boobs, two days later while they were changing. They were in the same room that the boob conversation (involving Tsukki’s in particular even) took place, it only made sense. It had nothing to do with the fact that they were just….nice. Yamaguchi still remembered noticing them for the first time. The summer after they turned 11, Tsukki had shown up to school devoid of puffy coats and baggy cardigans for the first time in months and Yamaguchi had been awestruck, as she often was about anything Tsukki-related, to find out that she had started wearing training bras. A lot of the other kids had the opposite reaction, sneering and gossiping behind their hands. They all assumed Tsukki must be padding her shirts to seem cool.

 

Yamaguchi stole another glance. She always knew they were wrong but if she ever doubted, she wouldn’t now. They weren’t huge or anything but there’s definitely some weight to them and the bra supporting it definitely didn’t have any extra padding. Tsukki shifted and Yamaguchi was momentarily transfixed by how the light revealed the shadow of some ribs and a pale mole nestled squarely on Tsukki’s sternum, cradled delicately by some plump cleavage.

 

“-..maguchi!”

 

“Yes?! Sorry!!” She jumped a mile in the air, startled and turned around to find Tanaka-senpai looking at her, one eyebrow raised.

 

“You good? You stopped moving and just stared at Tsukishima’s rack for like two minutes.”

 

“I wasn- no, I was just. Um…I was just. I-is that a new bra Tsukki?”

 

Tsukki, following Tanaka-senpai’s example, quirked a brow at her. “Yes.”

 

“O-oh. It’s...nice?”

 

Somewhere a little to her right, someone murmured “Why does that sound like a question?” under her breath and a little bit further to the right than that, there was a muffled snort. It sounded like Kageyama.

 

Tsukki’s other eyebrow went up and she glanced down at her bra. It _was_ nice, plain satin in a neutral shade of rosy-beige, muted and soft. The color looked really good against the fairness of her skin. Which was why Yamaguchi was just a tad confused when Tsukki went from just looking to frowning. It was small, barely a curve at the corner of her mouth, but having spent most of her life learning Tsukki’s miniscule expressions, Yamaguchi had no problem seeing it.

 

“Oi Tsukishima! You gonna impress someone?”

 

Nishinoya-senpai teased, shouldering past her to pluck at the straps criss-crossing in the middle of Tuskki’s chest holding the bra together, pulling at one with her index finger and letting it snap back in place. That snapped Tsukki out of it. The small frown on her face was gone before Yamaguchi could fully decipher it and she swatted at Nishinoya-senpai’s hand like she was waving away an annoying insect.  

 

“Obviously not.” Tsukki said, rolling her eyes. She yanked her jersey over her head and started pulling her hair up into a ponytail, signaling the end of the conversation.

 

=========================

 

If Tsukki noticed her running into walls or spacing out mid-conversation with growing frequency, she opted not to say anything about it. It put Yamaguchi on edge for a solid month, always wondering if she was looking too long or lingering too close. It made her try, perhaps way too hard, to be normal. She couldn’t help wondering every time she went out of her way to walk just a few inches father from Tsukki or look just a little to the left of Tsukki’s face whenever they talked, if she was in deep, deep shit. She knew it was suspicious as all hell but she couldn’t seem to stop.

 

Tsukki had always been too good at figuring things out and Yamaguchi had always been too bad at keeping secrets from her.  

 

But another month passed, and then two and Yamaguchi settled back into how things were, realizing that nothing was _really_ different. She’d been in love with Tsukki the whole time, nothing had to change just because she knew that now and didn’t before. Tsukki too, stayed the same. She went to club, ate lunch, walked to and from school next to Yamaguchi every day, aloof and gorgeous as always. She was no more or less biting or inscrutable as she always was, poking fun when she had to and staying a constant, quiet presence next to Yamaguchi the rest of the time. It was...good. Comfortable. Yamaguchi didn’t really want it to change, especially not for the worst.

 

It was hard though, not to want. Especially with Tsukki just right there, smart and cool and pretty. All she had to do was exist in Yamaguchi’s general direction and sometimes that was enough to make her want to spontaneously combust. But she also did things like pick up notes for her when she got sick, or pack extras whenever her mom makes those tuna sandwiches Yamaguchi really likes, little things that seem insignificant to other people but are huge considering Tsukki couldn’t be bothered to even be polite to literally anyone else the rest of the time. In the rare moments when anything or anyone earns a small smile out of her, but especially when it was Yamaguchi herself, she _longed_ so much it honestly alarmed her just a little.  

That year, golden week ended with a surprise mini field trip to Shichigahama. Summer crept up on them without warning, bringing with it hot, humid weather as soon as April flipped over to May and as if that wasn’t bad enough, the AC broke down at the lodge, so training camp was brutal to say the least. Half the team, Yamaguchi included nearly cried and threw themselves at Takeda sensei and Coach Ukai’s feet when they made the announcement halfway through the week that they were cutting training camp half a day early and taking them to the beach.

 

It was fun. None of them had bathing suits but they had no problem making the most out of their impromptu trip, making sand castles and splashing around in the shallows. Yacchi and Takeda sensei had been nice enough to buy them all watermelons and Yamaguchi laughed so hard she almost puked when they decided to play suikawari and Tsukki yelled incorrect directions at Tanaka-senpai so precisely, she managed to make her step on Kageyama’s half eaten watermelon.

 

But like with everything fun and games, it was just a matter of time until something went sideways and in this case it was Hinata, tripping over her own feet and spilling Kakigori all down Tsukki’s front, staining her shirt, shorts and even her socks with neon blue syrup. She had apologized profusely and offered Tsukki her last clean pair of shorts after and though Tsukki still looked like she would rather toss Hinata into the ocean than accept the apology, seeing as she had no clean clothes left, Tsukki grudgingly took the shorts.

 

Thankfully, they were about to leave anyway but not-thankfully, that meant Yamaguchi had to spend the entire drive home sitting next to a damp, sticky Tsukki wearing a black bra under her wet white t-shirt and shorts that may have been normal on someone who was 5’3 but barely covered _anything_ on someone above 6 feet.

 

The two of them were sat in the back and about halfway into the drive, while everyone was dozing off in their seats, without any warning whatsoever, Tsukki shimmied quietly out of her ruined shirt, draping it over the seat in front of her. Then she grabbed Yamaguchi’s volleyball club jacket and wrapped it around her shoulders like a blanket, leaving most of her front still exposed.

 

Yamaguchi stuttered something about being cold and sitting next to the window, to which Tsukki replied, matter-of-factly that the windows were tinted and “It’ll get damp if i zip it up.” She neglected to mention why she didn’t just wear her own jacket and blissfully oblivious to Yamaguchi’s mounting gay panic, proceeded to take a nap; tits out and long, bare legs just barely touching Yamaguchi’s due to the non existent space between the seats.

 

Yamaguchi spent the rest of the drive sitting ramrod straight and staring very _very_ hard at her phone.

  


At the end of June, taking advantage of her birthday falling on a weekend, Hinata left town  to “visit a friend” and came back with a girlfriend.

 

It was a secret all of 6 hours which was truly remarkable restraint on Hinata’s part. One of their first years had tripped over Hinata’s leg where it was sprawled out on the ground as she sat, half changed out of her uniform shirt,  blouse and sweater vest bunched around her neck like a tool. She was too busy texting to get out of it fully, tongue poking out of her mouth in concentration. The poor first year fell into Kageyama who then almost fell face first against a shelf.

 

When Kageyama naturally demanded to know what the hell she was doing (dumbass!), Hinata came right out, pun intended, with the truth.

 

Hinata had gone to Tokyo to visit Kenma, Kenma asked her out, they’re girlfriends now, the end.

 

First there was shrill, shocked yelling(mostly from Tanaka and Nishinoya-senpai), then truly awful jokes (only from Tanaka and Nishinoya-senpai)

 

“I can’t believe you’re dating an older woman!” Nishinoya.

 

“I knew you were going down to Tokyo to see a cat, but you were really down there to _get_ _Kenma’s_ cat!” Tanaka.

 

Hinata didn’t get that last one and fortunately Ennoshita-senpai had clamped a hand over Tanaka-senpai’s mouth before she could try to elaborate.

 

Hinata was a little embarrassed but happy and oddly, nothing else. Yamaguchi didn’t know why that was strange until someone congratulated Hinata and everyone else followed suit. She felt her own shoulders relax, unaware that she’d been tense until that moment. Hinata certainly hadn’t been, she just grinned her usual unreserved grin and Yamaguchi realized she was never worried about what anyone would say or how they would react, Yamaguchi had been worried for her.  

 

When asked later, why she didn’t tell her that she also liked girls, Hinata had shrugged and said, in a very Kozume-esque manner, “You didn’t ask.”

 

It made sense, but still Yamaguchi couldn’t help but feel like there’d been a sudden shift in the fabric of reality. When she mentioned this on their walk home, Tsukki just shrugged, hands shoved in the pockets of her blazer.

 

“It’s not that surprising.”

 

“Nothing surprises you anymore Tsukki.” Yamaguchi laughed.

 

“Most of the team is into girls.” Tsukki continued, sounding as bored and unaffected as always.

 

Yamaguchi managed not to trip on her own feet. Just barely but she did. She was very proud.

 

“Oh, how are you so sure?”

 

Tsukki gave her a sidelong look. “No one in Karasuno is exactly subtle.”

 

If she weren’t suddenly terrified of the implications of that statement, Yamaguchi would’ve argued that she certainly didn’t notice anyone else being anything but straight. As it was, she could only gape at the side of Tsukki’s head, thoughts racing a mile a minute. Distantly, she’s aware of the seconds ticking by and how weird she’s being but the more she tried to think of something to say, the more she panicked. Which, in hindsight, explained what came out of her mouth next.

 

“Do _you_ like girls Tsukki?”

 

Tsukki stopped walking and the whole world seemed to stop with her. Even the panicked thoughts rattling around in Yamaguchi’s head came to a halt. She didn’t know if it would’ve been more humiliating for Tsukki to hear them out loud or the sound of high-pitched horrified screaming that took their place.

 

Tsukki leveled her with a look Yamaguchi couldn’t quite read. Then, after what felt like an eternity, she asked “Would that be a problem?”

 

“Wh- No! Of course no-not. No not, umm no!!” Yamaguchi sputtered.

 

Tsukki’s unreadable expression turned into something doubtful and perhaps just a tad bit wary.

 

“I like girls too!” Yamaguchi blurted, realizing just a split second too late that what Tsukki said wasn’t really a confirmation of anything.

 

“....Congratulations?” Tsukki asked.

 

If the screaming in her head got any louder, she was sure Tsukki would be able to actually hear it.

 

Yamaguchi wondered if it would completely ruin their friendship if she were to bolt now and run straight to another city to start a new life.

 

“Anyway, like I said it’s not that weird. Tanaka-senpai is probably the only person on the team who’s solely into dick.” Tsukki said, resuming their walk.

 

The casual, blunt irreverence of the statement snapped Yamaguchi back to the present. She blinked and Tsukki was two steps  ahead of her and slowly getting further away, resuming their walk home like nothing out of the ordinary had transpired. Yamaguchi stood frozen to the spot for a few more seconds just letting the fact sink in, that she had just come out to Tsukki and it was okay. Everything was okay.  She beamed, still on emotional auto-pilot and jogged up to fall in line next to Tsukki again.

 

“Nishinoya-senpai was pretty into Shimizu-senpai for a while though!”

 

“She’s dating Azumane-san Yamaguchi.”

 

“What?? Since when??”

 

They spent the rest of the walk home talking about whatever random topic came up and Yamaguchi was so happy and relieved, it didn’t even occur to her to wonder about Tsukki’s non-answer to her question.

 

============================

 

The bullshit thing was, when it happened,  nothing even prompted it.

 

No one gave her an encouraging speech about how it would all work out. There was no sign from the universe, no ill-advised highschool party with booze or truth or dare or dark, stuffy closets to be trapped into, no boy sniffing around to make her jealous, nothing. None of that happened.

 

Yamaguchi, one normal afternoon, just decided to ruin her life completely of her own volition.

 

It was a regular school day and they had stopped by at a mcdonalds on their way home because Yamaguchi had been starving and she wanted the greasiest, most over-seasoned, caloric nightmare she could find. She was pretty sure her period was coming up. Later, that’s what she would blame it on, raging, unmitigated hormones.  

 

Tsukki was picking idly at her food, consuming her meagre meal of fries and snack-sized mc-flurry at regular Tsukki speed, eating one ice cream dipped fry every 20 minutes or so and halfway into scarfing down her mega-mac, Yamaguchi looked over at her and  the gaping void in her stomach suddenly disappeared, replaced by a particularly rowdy swarm of butterflies.

 

Summer was still going strong, clinging to the last few weeks of September and making the days hot and humid. Despite that though, Tsukki hadn’t abandoned her long button up and sweater vest, red school ribbon still tied immaculately around her collar where Yamaguchi’s had long been discarded in her school bag to free up the first three buttons of her shirt. Her bangs were starting to get a bit too long and they were pinned back from her forehead with plain silver hair clips, the rest of her hair woven into its usual, neat braid.

 

There was a light sheen of sweat along her hairline and the tip of her nose, and pink imprints on her cheeks where her sports glasses had sat during practice. She had an elbow on the table, chin cradled on her upturned palm. Two of her fingers are still wrapped in sports tape and from around the dirty white cotton, Yamaguchi could see calluses peeking out, rough and bulbous.

 

She was so beautiful, Yamaguchi wanted to scream.

 

Tsukki hadn’t ordered a drink and she reached across the table for Yamaguchi’s. She didn’t even ask. She stopped asking two weeks after they became friends. Yamaguchi always said yes. Yes Tsukki, you can have some. Of course Tsukki you can borrow it. Oh please Tsukki, help yourself. If she had the ability to know beforehand that Tsukki would ask something of her, it probably didn’t matter what it was, Yamaguchi would always offer it first, without question.

 

“Tsukki, you’re so pretty.”

 

Tsukki paused, arm still hovering above the table and Yamaguchi’s soda clutched loosely in her fingers. She halted so perfectly, it looked like someone hit a pause button and Tsukki froze in perfect tableau. Even her expression hadn’t changed and that’s how Yamaguchi knew she really took her by surprise. Any other moment but this one, it might’ve been funny.

 

Tsukki blinked slowly once, twice. Then she looked at Yamaguchi, face carefully blank, save for her eyes, which were still wide and startled.

 

“Thanks…?”

 

Distantly, Yamaguchi was aware of the last bit of sense she had left, screaming at her to stop and back pedal like her life depended on it but it was immediately drowned out by the sudden, _need_ that had her in a chokehold, telling her she had to let Tsukki know. She had to tell her.

 

“No, i mean you’re...you’re _really_ pretty.”

 

“Th...anks…?” Tsukki said again, slower this time.

 

“Pretty in the I want to hold your hand and kiss you way!” Yamaguchi blurted out in a rush. She could feel her ears burning. And her cheeks. And her neck. The blush was taking over her entire head so fast, she felt faint with it.

 

Or maybe it was the way Tsukki’s jaw had fallen slack, the way her eyes got impossibly wider, and the sinking knowledge that maybe Yamaguchi had just royally screwed up their friendship.

 

The longest few moments of Yamaguchi’s life passed by in silence. It could’ve been 20 seconds or 20 years. Yamaguchi honestly couldn’t tell, and once it was over, she opened her mouth to speak.

 

What happened next was both a relief and a horor. No words made it out but the weird, choking noise that started from her throat barely did either before it was drowned out by the sounds Tsukki were making.

 

Tsukki laughed. Tsukki was still laughing. Tsukki was laughing _at her_.

 

Yamaguchi couldn’t quite comprehend her reaction to that at first. She felt the tightening in her stomach and the pressure in her chest but she didn’t recognize what they meant until she felt the slight sting behind her eyes.

 

She didn’t like to think about what would happen if this day ever came, but even the worst things her anxious imagination forced her to think didn’t measure up to this.

 

She hadn’t cried in front of Tsukki since they were 8 and she didn’t want to start now. Yamaguchi made a move to get up, to do what, she didn’t know. Either to yell at Tsukki or run away but before she could do either of those things, Tsukki reached across the table and grabbed her wrist.

 

“Yamaguchi. You say this to me now? We’re in a mcdonalds.”

 

Yamaguchi wanted to blink but she’s afraid if she did, she might cry.  “What?”

 

Tsukki was still holding onto her with one hand and she released Yamaguchi’s drink so she could wrap the other one around Yamaguchi’s wrist too as if she was afraid Yamaguchi might still bolt. She was smiling, but it wasn’t cruel or mocking. It was the kind of smile Yamaguchi had only seen once before, in the dark pathway between the gyms at Shinzen, when the impossible happened for the first time.

 

_When did you get so cool?_

 

When more seconds ticked by and Yamaguchi remained standing there, gaping like a stunned fish, Tsukki sighed.

 

“Let’s go.” she said, shouldering her bag and getting up. She began walking away without another word and without letting go of Yamaguchi and Yamaguchi had to scramble after her, grabbing her own bag and throwing her discarded sweater vest over her shoulder.

 

Tsukki half pulled, half dragged her out of the mcdonalds and about a block down the road in complete silence, ignoring Yamaguchi’s nervous sputtering the whole time. She didn’t stop until they were on a stretch of road without any people, in the orange-purple shadows between street lamps.

 

“Sorry about that, people were starting to stare.” Tsukki offered finally by way of explanation, glancing at Yamaguchi over her shoulder.

 

The response was automatic.“Oh! Sorry Tsukki.”

 

“Why are you apologizing?” Tsukki asked, turning around to fully face her and before Yamaguchi could say anything else, she added “I was wondering how much less I had to start wearing around you before you got the hint.”

 

Yamaguchi really wished she could’ve come up with a better response than “You-...I. _Huh_???” but alas.

 

She expected Tsukki to laugh at her again or maybe roll her eyes and heave out that quiet, long-suffering sigh she was so familiar with but Tsukki did none of those things. Instead she just stood there with hands shoved casually in the pockets of her blazer, narrow shoulders relaxed, one heel scuffed against the pavement, like she had absolutely nowhere else to be, smiling that impossible smile. It was small and a little stiff, obviously unpracticed in the way it was ever so slightly crooked but Yamaguchi could see the hint of straight white teeth behind it and the slight crinkling in the corners of Tsukki’s eyes where the smile reached them.   

 

“I think you’re pretty too. In the I want to hold your hand and kiss you way.” Tsukki said, taking her hands out of her pockets to make air quotes around the words. Her smile was still there and it was still the most endearing thing Yamaguchi probably ever saw, which was why it was such a shame when it was immediately wiped off her face and was replaced with mild alarm.

 

“Are you crying??” Tsukki asked, taking a hesitant step forward, arms stretched out awkwardly in front of her.

 

“I’m not, I’m just sweating. It’s hot out here.” Yamaguchi sniffed, wiping clumsily at her eyes.

 

“...I see.” Tsukki mumbled. Yamaguchi peered up at her through damp lashes and she wasn’t sure who started it, if someone did or if they both cracked up at the same time but suddenly they were both laughing; Big, full belly laughs that dissolved into soft, airy giggles. Tsukki’s laugh was so much quieter than hers but Yamaguchi heard it all the same. It all felt so surreal; awkward and weird but also kind of great, the best even.

 

She stopped first, wiping at her eyes again. Tsukki followed suit a few seconds later, laughter petering out into some last few chuckles; quiet and deep. Tsukki’s voice was always just a tad bit deeper than most girls Yamaguchi knew and the sound of it sent a slight shiver down her spine.

 

“So...did you always know?” she asked. “That I, you know?” Yamaguchi asked.

 

Tsukki looked at her for a long, long moment. “Wouldn't have been parading around in front of you half naked if I was sure you did.”

 

“Why didn’t you just say something??” Yamaguchi asked, realizing just a second too late what came out of her mouth.

 

The look tsukki gave her then implied she certainly had _something_ to say about that but she didn’t. Which, Yamaguchi supposed, was proof enough that Tsukki really did feel the same about her. Oh god, Tsukki liked her back. Tsukki _liked_ her back. Tsukki liked _her_ back.

 

The thought was enough to bowl her over, enough to make her want to scream and jump and do all sorts of weird, embarrassing things.

 

So of course, in the face of it, Yamaguchi did the only thing that made sense to do. She put both hands on Tsukki’s cheeks and pulled her in. She did it so fast, Tsukki wasn’t able to adjust accordingly. Their noses knocked together and she felt more of Tsukki’s teeth than her lips. She tried to pull back, apologies already building up on her tongue but then Tsukki’s head was tilting ever so slightly to the side and then there were hands on her cheeks, rough with cotton and calluses. Tsukki’s lips were gentle against hers, soft but insistent, kissing her with a firmness that had Yamaguchi’s mouth yielding, melting.

 

It was so strange, to know that she could feel like she was floating and getting punched in the chest at the same time.

 

They didn’t talk about it after, not in so many words. But that was okay, clearly they weren’t great at that. But they spent the rest of the walk home, fingers linked together. It was  comforting and familiar but at the same time not at all. And that was okay too. They’d maybe been in love with each other the whole time, nothing had to change just because they knew that now and didn’t before.

**Author's Note:**

> Find me @ [tsukkibigbitchenergykei ](https://tsukkibigbitchenergykei.tumblr.com)on tumblr


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